After The Service
For many the funeral service is only the begining of the journey of grief and loss. Over the coming days as you navigate the new reality you find yourself you may have days that are up and down. There’s no time limit on grief and nothing can truly fix the pain of losing someone. There is however some helpful tips you can use to help you during these difficult times.
1. Stay in touch. Ensure you stay connected to those around you and not allow yourself to remain or become isolate. A lot of the time family and friends may want to give you space and time to process so be open to reaching out and connecting with them. There are also many local groups that offer great assistance with processing and talking through your journey.
2. Don’t set expectations on yourself to “Return to Normal”. Your reality has been significantly adjusted and therefore your ‘normal’ has also adjusted. There’s no timetable when it comes to life becoming more comfortable so allow yourself time.
3. Keep your weeks organised. There can still be plenty of tasks to carry out after the funeral has concluded. Memorialising ashes or deciding on a display plate for the gravesite. Further there will be matters to look after regarding the affairs of loved ones estate. Cornerstone Funerals will provide you the original Death Certificate from the registery of Births, Deaths and Marraiges. Along with this we will make sure certified copies are provided to assist you with handling the estate. If you require more copies bring the original to one of our offices to be copied and certified.
4. Ask friends or family to assist with going through your loved ones possessions. What items will you keep, what will you sell and what will you give to charity. Having a few people around you to assist through this process will be beneficial and at some point you will need to go through these items. If you’re having a difficult time there’s lots of counsellors who can assist you navigating this very difficult process.
Some Ways To Help Someone After the Loss
While you cannot take away the pain of the loss, there are many ways to help a grieving friend or loved one through the painful days following the funeral by providing comfort, strength and support. Here are some things to keep in mind:
Create a new tradition. Most of life has been shared with an individual who is now gone. Even trips to the grocery store can bring back memories and re-emphasize the pain of the loss. As a caring friend, you can help make new memories that do not include the departed loved one. New places to go eat or shop, local events that were not celebrated, or even short trips to places not visited can go a long way to making new traditions.
Write down important dates. Some days will be more difficult than others to process and overcome. You can make anniversaries, birthdays, holidays or other special occasions easier by sending a card or making a phone call. Make sure that your loved one does not spend those days alone. If you are uncertain of those days, ask another close family member to inform you of the days most likely to be difficult.
Share when the deceased is on your mind. One of the most isolating feelings that the grieving individual will have is the thought that no one else will remember the departed loved one. When something in your life reminds you of that person, send a card or note to let the person know that you remember and care.
With just a few moments of planning and care, you can make the days that follow the funeral feel less awkward and alone. You can reassure your loved one that you care and that together there will be strength and encouragement for the road ahead.
Northside Grief Group
WHERE: REDCLIFFE LIBRARY 476 OXLEY AVE REDCLIFFE
WHEN: FIND OUT WHEN WE NEXT MEET ON
OR CONTACT TASHA 0434347764 FOR INFORMATION
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